What do both little girls and many Silicon Valley bros believe will bring them ultimate happiness and bliss? Unicorns.
Like most of the history of the unicorn, the little girl and the tech bro likely picture very different things when they hear the word “unicorn”. The idea of the unicorn has been around for centuries, even millenia, however unlike other mythical creatures that have faded into the mists of history, the unicorn still thrives in modern language and culture. How did a mythical creature, whose very name is a synonym for rarity, become such a staple of multiple cultures?
One of the earliest uses of the English word unicorn was probably by translators for the King James Bible, and sadly, that is where we lost the term monoceros. The Bible does mention unicorns several times, focusing on their strength, but it was likely referring to either a rhinoceros or a large wild ox or goat, which is too bad because unicorns would definitely make for some exciting Bible stories.
Unicorns have always been subject to opinion, but the earliest drawing of a unicorn was thousands of years before written language, on the walls of Chauvet cave. Its a unicorn. Technically a woolly rhino, but same same.
The first recorded description of a unicorn was actually very precise, and a remarkably similar description to the modern stereotype of a unicorn, minus the rainbows. It was found in Indica, a 5th century BCE Greek record of stories of India by Cnidus. Even though no complete book survives, many ancient writers referenced it, and there are a few surviving fragments as well. The book was widely mocked even in ancient times due to the many outrageous descriptions. It describes them as wild asses, as large or larger than horses, a single horn coming out of the head. He had a very specific description of the appearance, the body is white, the head reddish, blue eyes, with a horn about 18 inches long, the base is white, the middle black, and the end bright flaming red. He was super obsessed with their huckle bone too, kept going on about it, which is apparently their hips, he described it as cinnabar, but I would call it light red. Apparently unicorn hips dont lie. As in the Bible, he emphasized their strength, but also their speed. He is likely the origin of the key medieval unicorn beliefs, they are loyal, and their horns can detect and protect against poison. He stated the only way they could be killed was if they had young ones, and they would stay to protect them, which seems a bit cruel. Although he didn’t include any recipes, he did helpfully note that the flesh was no good, too bitter. The main goal for killing an a unicorn at that time, was the horn, and that huck bone.
Pliny the Elder, was the next to leave a record of a unicorn, likely copied or at least inspired by Indica. Pliny, was a really interesting character, wrote about Bigfoot, was Roman naval commander, renaissance man a thousand years before the renaissance, and quite literally went out with a bang in the eruption of Mt Vesuvius in 79 AD. He described Unicorns like this: “But that the fiercest animal is the Monocerotem (Unicorn), which in the rest of the body resembles a horse, but in the head a stag, in the feet an elephant, and in the tail a boar, and has a deep bellow, and a single black horn three feet long projecting from the middle of the forehead. They say that it is impossible to capture this animal alive.” It is interesting to note, that while he kept part of the original description, he added that the legs looked like that of an elephant, which would seem to indicate some stories of the true unicorn, the rhinoceros. Also, Pliny clearly couldn’t resist exaggerating the length of the horn. Shesh, guys. Thankfully, he laid off the hipbones.
These stories laid the foundation for the heyday of the unicorn, the middle ages. In the 13th century Marco Polo saw his first unicorn, and was apparently quite disappointed. He describes it thus: “They have hair like that of a buffalo, feet like those of an elephant, and a horn in the middle of the forehead, which is black and very thick….The head resembles that of a wild boar, and they carry it ever bent towards the ground. They delight much to abide in mire and mud. ‘Tis a passing ugly beast to look upon, and is not in the least like that which our stories tell of as being caught in the lap of a virgin; in fact, ’tis altogether different from what we fancied” Curiously though, Marco Polo was under the impression that the most dangerous thing about the unicorn was its tongue, which he thought could inflict considerable damage.
Unicorn belief solidified in the middle ages, in art and in legend. By the middle ages, unicorns were white, powerful, their horns could detect poison, almost impossible to kill, but their weak spot was no longer their babies, it was…virgins. Yup, unicorns got tied into the Virgin Mary, and thanks to their pure white, became associated with virgins. The legend was that you needed a virgin to lure a unicorn in, they would come in and lay their heads down on their laps. Most people in the middle ages were focused on staying alive till their 30th birthday, but what did attract attention was the idea that unicorn horns could detect and neutralize poison. Since poison was a very popular way of removing kings, unicorn horns became one of the most sought after materials after relics of the cross in Europe. Economic systems did their job and traders found unicorn horns, and heads of Europe gladly shelled out fortunes for them, much to the chagrin of narwhals and their Beluga cousins everywhere. You can still find Narwhal….er unicorn horns on the throne of Denmark. Also, interestingly, they have three life size lions of silver.
Scotland enthusiastically adopted the unicorn belief, their flag of crossed unicorn horns is one of the oldest in the world, with the first uses recorded in the 13th or 14th century. So most countries have a national animal, the US- Bald Eagle, Russia- Bear, England- Lion Scotland- Unicorn. Which you would think would point to a cultural serious drinking problem, but the Scots decided the unicorn, proud, never captured or tamed. (Never mind 1707)
Whether you love unicorns because rhinos are awesome, you like their hips, you are trying to keep from getting poisoned, or you just think they are just so fluffy, you are in good company, alone with thousands of years of human history spanning multiple cultures and continents.